I’m 20 now but I’m still the me that got stuck on an infinite loop when I was 14. When I lost the girl I was yet at the same time held onto her with a grip tighter than anyone should hold onto anything. I picked up the pieces of myself that I found on the floor and as I tried to put myself back together I forgot to grow. I’m still afraid. I try to live my life without fear and so I forget that I’m scared but at the end of the day it’s fear that’s at the steering wheel. It’s fear that wont even press the gas petal because even if I’m a safe driver there will always be drunks on the road. I don’t know how to be any other me than the one I was before my world shattered. I’m 20 now but I’m still 14 because I haven’t been able to move on from that moment even though time has passed it by many years ago. I’m still there. I’m still in my room short of breath muttering “it never happened” feeling so disgusted with myself and knowing that everyone else would be too and I don’t know how to stop.
Everyone has moved on except me. Without what I have, where would I be? I’ve been stuck in one place for too long. I’ve taken no turns, so none could be wrong? I see their lives pass by every day while mine has been quite a delay. Their milestones happen left and right and I’m so tired of this nonexistent fight. I’m stuck in my old ways hunting for new What’s holding me down might be super glue. I’m looking back at each past mistake reaching out for all the lessons I can take. But how can I learn from my past if I’m there? The only way out is a dimensional tear.
Can you please take regular showers before you decide it’s a good idea to invite yourself into my car because seriously I am sick of smelly people riding in my car it is unpleasant and now I feel like my back seats are contaminated with body odor and it’s not like I can just say “no you can’t ride in my car because you smell bad” but seriously why don’t you bathe?
this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)
OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT’S BACK ON MY DASH.
THIS SHIT WORKS OKAY, I AM DEAD SERIOUS.
The last time I saw this on my dash, I didn’t think it would happen, so jokingly I wished I could go to a fun. concert.
AND GUESS WHAT, I WENT TO A FUCKING FUN. CONCERT.
THIS SHIT WORKS, TRY IT.
I SAW THIS ON MY DASH THE OTHER DAY AND THOUGHT “ITS WORTH A TRY” SO I WISHED I COULD GET A 3DS
LITERALLY LIKE 4 DAYS LATER MY DAD SENT ME A PICTURE OF THE 3DS XL HE BOUGHT FOR ME WHILE I WAS AT SCHOOL
IM STILL FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS
holy fuck, I didn’t expect this to work, I was like psh, whatever it’s just a quick reblog, but I wished my Dad would actually respond back to me AND HE FUCKING DID A FEW DAYS LATER, I GOT A FUCKING TEXT FROM MY DAD TODAY WHO HASN’T SPOKEN OR RESPONDED TO ME IN MONTHS HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS MAGIC IT WORKS.
I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND AND I DIDN’T THINK I’D GET DAYS OFF BUT THIS WEEKEND I’M HEADING UP THERE??? THIS IS CRAZY SHIT
SO LIKE I JOKINGLY WISHED FOR MY OWN LEN KAGAMINE AND THEN LIKE A WEEK LATER I GOT A LEN NENDOROID??? H ELP
WTF OKAY SO THIS SHOT ACTUALLY WORKS BECAUSE WHEN I WISHED, I HAD WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD LIKE ME BACK AND GUESS WHAT? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW. WHAT THE HELLLLL?????
ok I’ve said this before but IM DOING IT AGAIN THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS, MY WISH DID COME TRUE SO I REBLOGED AGAIN AND SAID IT IN THE TAGS BUT THEN I WISHED FOR SMTH ELSE AND IT LITERALLY LITERALLY HAPPENED LIKE A COUPLE DAYS LATER WHAT THE HELL SO NOW IM WRITING THIS HERE FOR YOU BC I DONT BELIEVE IN THIS CRAP BUT STILL IT’S AN AWFULLY BIG COINCIDENCE
I cannot wait until we’re financially stable and we have real lives and hang out with each other and hang out with our work friends and have class schedules and spend every day on our very own couch playing on real game consoles on out very own TV and we’ll make each other tea and sandwiches and kick each other’s asses in all your favorite fighting games and take silly pictures together in our nice clean apartment and surprise each other with gifts just because and just live the life we’ve been striving for this whole time
I’m stuck eating raisins and celery and lite soups and nuts and seeds and my thighs are slowly beginning to separate again because I can’t control myself and just the thought of that makes me feel like I don’t deserve you